


Let's go back

by lorinhazuzu



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, larry stylinson - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-09
Updated: 2012-10-09
Packaged: 2017-11-15 23:57:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/533204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorinhazuzu/pseuds/lorinhazuzu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis misses Harry and how it used to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let's go back

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea this morning at work and when I got home I just had to write it.  
> As usual this is not edited, tread with caution.

‘He looks different’ is the first thing Louis thinks when he sees Harry. 

They have rehearsals that afternoon, they’ll be performing at the Teen Awards in a couple of days and they’ll be singing ‘Live while we’re young’ for the first time.

They are all quite excited, as well as nervous about it, and Louis is fretting about, asking the boys whether they’re alright at least five times in as many minutes.

All of those thoughts however, evaporate as soon as Harry walks in.

Being the youngest of them all, Harry was predictably the one who had the most to grow still. And grow he did.

He changed so much and so fast, Louis had trouble keeping up with it. Harry had gone from an adorable, bright eyed, curly haired teenager, to a party-hard, popular young adult, who Louis had trouble recognising as that same Harry he met two years ago.

Suddenly, Harry was full of friends Louis didn’t know of, doing things Louis didn’t even hear about until much later. Or, until he saw it in the papers.

In the last couple of months especially, Harry had been pulling away from Louis more and more; Louis had felt the shift in their relationship acutely, but had attributed it to all the rumours in the media about the two of them, and that it might have made him uncomfortable.

Because of that assumption, Louis had left the subject go without discussing it, and regretted that decision everyday he heard Harry talking about someone Louis didn’t even know Harry knew, or something he did which a few months prior, would’ve meant that Louis would’ve been right there alongside Harry, helping him tell the story, instead of listening to it.

But then Harry walks in and Louis feels like its two year ago all over again.

Harry has very obviously had a haircut; his hair is looking shorter and curlier than Louis has seen it in months.

Louis had never realised how much he missed that curly hair. The change had been quite gradual after all, the longer Harry’s unruly hair grew, the more it lost it’s curl; but now, with it’s shorter cut, it was back with a vengeance. Just the sight of the lovely, fluffy hair, made Louis’ fingers itch, wanting to touch it like he used to.

He refrained, instead turning around and sitting on the small couch they had in the room, and bracing himself for another story of yet another wild night Harry had out with Nick-what’s-his-name and Louis-doesn’t-know-who-else.

He’s sure it happened by how normal sized Harry’s usually big green eyes are, and how pale his face is, something that happens when he’s tired.

Louis leans his head back and closes his eyes, waiting for Harry’s voice to join the others on the background. Instead he feels the shift on the couch and surprised at the ticklish feeling of someone’s hair on his neck, he peeks through a slightly opened eye - though he didn’t need to, Harry’s smell is very easily recognisable - to see Harry; head leaning on Louis’ shoulder.

Slightly awed, Louis looks at him. He can’t see much of his face in the angle he’s looking from, but still, he looks and looks for a few stretched seconds until Harry nuzzles his cheek against Louis’ shoulder in an action that is very familiar to Louis.

Knowing what he wants, but still hesitant to act on it – they haven’t done this in a while, haven’t really been this close to each other in months – his hand hovers in the air for a few seconds that are obviously too long for Harry, because he nuzzles his face on Louis shoulder again, a bit more insistently this time, and with a sigh Louis’ hand falls onto Harry’s hair, petting and combing through it in a familiar rhythm.

Harry had been (still was?) a very cuddly person when they first met, and Louis was no different, so with their very handsy personalities and Louis’ fascination with Harry’s hair it was only natural that this grew to be one of their past-times. It wasn’t something they’d done recently though, and Louis had missed it.

“I missed you Haz” The words slip past his lips easily, thoughtlessly.  
He can feel Harry moving and Louis looks down to find that Harry’s wide eyes are on him and they seem strangely sad. They are still heartbreakingly beautiful of course, but Louis prefers it when they are twinkling with mischief, or just bright and happy.  
“You did?” Harry murmurs back at him.  
“Uhmm” Louis hums, instinctively keeping quiet, he knows this conversation is only meant for the two of them.  
Harry sighs and it sounds so despondent, that Louis feels a bit floorless, wanting to help but not knowing how.  
“What is it Haz?” He whispers, mouth close to Harry’s ear, meant for him only.  
“I’m tired” He answers simply, and Louis would think it was from the late night he’s just had, except – except if that was all, then Harry would definitely have no need to sound so dejected.  
“Tired of what Haz?” He asks softly, he feels worried, the emotion flows through him sluggishly, reflective of Harry’s melancholic mood.  
“Of trying”   
Louis tries very hard to figure out what Harry means, but whichever way he looks at it, he’s just not making any sense.  
“Haz? Come on tell me what’s wrong” Louis nudges Harry lightly, encouraging him.  
“I just – I don’t want to be this anymore” He hides his face on Louis shoulder, and Louis can’t resist throwing an arm around his shoulder, bringing Harry closer. He wants to comfort him, cuddle him until he’s bright eyed and shining again.  
“You don’t have to be anything you don’t want to Haz. Or do anything” he tags on at the end.  
“But I do, and I try really hard but it’s not working” he sounds close to tears now and Louis, helpless, looks up, eyes catching Liam who’s looking at both of them, expression worried. Catching his eye, Louis sends him a pleading look, and Liam nods immediately coming up with some sort of excuse and shuffling the others out of the room.  
When they are alone, Louis turns around, sitting sideways so he can face Harry.  
“What are you trying to do Haz?” he picks up their conversation, eyes meeting Harry’s doleful ones.  
“I, I want you – I want you to notice me” He finally gets out, face going a dark shade of red.  
Louis doesn’t really understand.  
“What do you mean Harry?” He asks, confused, but Harry’s gone, can’t seem to stop talking now that he’s started, babbling on some nonsense Louis only understands half of.  
“I try - You don’t notice. Kept calling me babycakes… Don’t like it. Too young. Wouldn’t want me”  
He keeps going, but Louis is not paying attention anymore, too afraid he knows exactly what Harry is talking about, but hoping he’s wrong anyway.  
“Harry, Haz? Slow down yeah? Breath for a second” Louis stares at Harry worried, he’s worked himself up into a state, breathing quick and face flushed. His eyes focus on Louis’ though, and he takes a deep breath through his nose, and they both breath out together.  
“What did you want me to notice Haz?” he tries again after Harry’s calmed out a bit.  
“Me” he mumbles, face warm in Louis’ hands, “but you just – ‘m not, ‘m not a baby.”  
“I never said you were Haz” Louis tries to console him, but Harry is obstinate.  
“Kept calling me baby Haz and babycakes, you’d never want a baby” he spits out the word ‘baby’ derisively, and Louis looks at him sadly, finally understanding the reason behind so many things Harry has done in the past few months. The whole moving out thing for one, and the whole I’m-too-busy-and-too-cool-for-you act, he’d been putting on for so long Louis almost felt like he didn’t know him anymore.  
“I didn’t mean for you to feel like this Haz, of course I want you” it’s a knowledge that has been kept buried down and put away but nevertheless accepted a long time ago. Louis doesn’t have to think about it, he just does.  
“Really? Like, like, you really want me?” He sounds both incredulous and unsure, as if he thinks Louis is not getting what he really means.

To clear up confusion, Louis leans in, pressing a lingering kiss to Harry’s pouted lips. He pulls back about to confirm that yes, he does want Harry, very much, but unwilling to part Harry follows him, lips searching, wanting until they meet Louis’ again.

Louis gives in easily enough, let’s Harry familiarise himself with the feel and shape of Louis’ lips as Louis does the exact same, lips meeting again and again, curious, cautious little pecks that grow into something more as Louis pushes against him, eager for more, tongue lapping at Harry’s bottom lip until he opens them.

He’s not sure whether the whimpering sound comes from him or Harry and he’s also not particularly bothered to find out, because Harry tastes amazing, he tastes like Harry, and Louis thinks that there can’t be anything better than that.

When they finally separate, Harry burrows downs against Louis, nuzzling on his collarbones and Louis’ hand immediately go up to his hair, so he can go back to petting him, playing with the strands of soft hair.

“You wouldn’t kiss a baby like that” Harry mouths the words on his neck  
“No I wouldn’t” Louis agrees, smiling.

“I love your hair Harry” he says after a while and Harry hums in response.  
“It reminds me of old you”  
Harry pull away slightly, but Louis refuses to take his hands off his hair, so he moves with him, keeping a distance that’s just enough for them to look at each other.  
“What do you mean?” Harry frowns, puzzled.  
“I missed old you,” Louis shrugs, “I missed my babycakes” he smiles, ruffling Harry’s hair slightly, but it’s obviously too early for jokes because Harry just scowls, pulling away completely so that Louis’ hand falls in between them.  
“Don’t do that, it makes me feel like I’m you little brother or something”  
Louis smiles sadly, it’s true, that how Louis treats him might remind them a bit of how someone would treat his baby brother, but before today it was pretty much the only way Louis could be affectionate towards Harry, without weirding him out or stirring up even more malicious rumours.  
“You’re my baby Hazza” He says ignoring the way Harry’s scowl becomes more pronounced, “and I love you” he finishes, watching in awe how Harry’s whole countenance changes in seconds, expression lifting, happy.  
“Even if I am dorky, not-really-that cool and three years younger than you?” He asks, lips twitching in the beginning of a smile.  
“Especially because of that, yes.”  
“I love you too.” Harry grins, eyes alight and happy again.  
And basically that’s all Louis really wanted.


End file.
